Georgia Adams - clinic patient, age 82,  an elderly woman who notices she's been feeling unusually good. She has a renewed appreciation for music and colors seem brighter. She also has a renewed appreciation for cute butts, sexy beards, and has developed a crush on Ashton Kutcher. She notes with enthusiasm that House and Ashton have the same "bedroom eyes." Has a grown son, Mark, who is a bit of a jerk. She wrote a poem for House, to the great amusement of Wilson:

The healer with his magic powers
I could rub his gentle brow for hours.
His manly chest, his stubbled jaw,
Everything about him leaves me raw...
with joy.
O, House, your very name
Will never leave this girl the same.

Georgia tests positive for syphilis. She contracted "Cupid's disease" in 1939 on prom night from a boy with a Chevrolet, before meeting her husband. House prescribes penicillin. Georgia is reluctant to take the medicine, because she likes how she feels. House assures her that the penicillin with only kill the spirochetes which have been eating her brain cells. Georgia is overjoyed to learn her brain damage in permanent, and assures House (with a saucy wink) she will return for a check-up.
Status: presumed cured. [108]

Mark Adams - son of Georgia Adams. Notably obnoxious and grumpy, dismissive of his mother's concerns about her health, though he does grudgingly look after her. House takes an immediate dislike to him. He is initially outraged at Georgia's diagnosis of syphilis, then shocked that his mother had sex before marriage. He also seemed surprised that his parents had not had sex for seven years before his father's death from a heart attack eight years previous. [108]

Rebecca Adler
- Patient, Age 29, kindergarten teacher, lives alone, has a dog (with fleas), and likes ham. Mother died of a heart attack four years previous, father broke his back doing construction. Has a romantic interest named Brad, with whom she had three dates. Diagnosed with 
neurocysticercosis. Status: Cured.  [101]

Nurse Alpert - Nurse in the maternity ward at PPTH. Arranged an ambulance for the Labor Couple to be sent to Princeton General. [104]

Amy - a teenage girl in Matthew Davis' AP Calculus exam class. Is caught cheating on the exam when she audibly snaps her cell phone shut while receiving texted answers from a girl behind her. She surrenders the phone with ill grace and a critique of Mrs. Miller's frumpy blouse. She rushed to Matt's aid when he collapses, and convinces Mrs. Miller that Matt is actually sick. [108]

April - Nurse. Assisted Chase in the care of Brandon Merrell. [103]

Arsenio - Nurse. Owns a camera-phone. [105]

Asthma Boy - Clinic patient whose mom fears frequent use of strong medications. Diagnosis: asthma. Status: needs to use his inhaler more often. [101]

Asthma Mom - Mother of Asthma Boy, a clinic patient. House felt she was ill-informed about asthma. [101]

Sister Mary Augustine
- Patient, admitted through the clinic.Age: at least 38, nun. Parents died when she was six years old, and she was placed in Catholic foster care. She ran away from her foster home at age twelve and lived on the streets. During this time, she used drugs and got a tattoo of a skunk on her shoulder. At age fifteen she became pregnant, despite using multiple forms of contraception, including an IUD. She tried to abort the pregnancy herself, and became ill. She had the realization that one can not be angry with God and be an atheist at the same time, and returned to the church and joined the monastery at age eighteen. Her favorite Bible verse is from the story of the Prodigal Son. Augustine is friendly, and likes to hear people talk about themselves. While in the hospital, she had a brief crisis of faith, but regained it after a brief talk with Chase. Diagnosis: Copper allergy, aggravated by continuous exposure from a copper IUD. Status: Greatly improved after removal of the IUD. [105]


Dr. Benson - Unseen doctor at PPTH, paged over the PA [104]

Billy - a student in Rebecca Adler's class. [101]

Black Couple - surprised parents of Good Looking Baby. [104]

Brad - had three dates with Rebecca Adler. [101]

Brandy - R&B singer and actress, apparently playing herself. [109]

Breast-fed Baby - Clinic patient. Unvaccinated child with a swollen face, easily amused by an all-natural stuffed frog. Probably soon-to-be-vaccinated after House's horrifying speech about tiny coffins. Child of Yummy Mummy. Diagnosis: cold. [102]

Adam Brown - Clinic patient whose throat has "some sort of condition."  House calls Cuddy for a consult, largely for the purpose of busting her chops. She diagnoses a sore throat, and prescribes hot tea. Status: presumed cured. [103]

Bus Driver - drove the school bus ridden by Matthew Davis and Chi Ling. Doesn't much like his teenage charges. He became concerned about a rash on his groin when learning of the poisoning of Matt and Chi. Chase tells him it isn't a symptom, and neither is being obnoxious, so he'll be fine. [108]

Mrs. Campbell - Clinic patient. Occupation: Preschool teacher. Comes to the clinic compaining of shortness of breath and tightness in the chest. She is a non-smoker with no history of heart disease in the family. House suggests she's perhaps a little anemic, but orders an EKG and blood tests, including a tox screen. When she lowers her gown, House notices, and is very impressed by, her large breast implants. She explains that they were a gift for husband's 40th birthday. House calls Wilson for a consult, as a pretext to admire the impressive boobs. The EKG results ahow a decreased heart rate. House inquires as to whether her husband has high blood pressure. Mrs. Campbell confirms that he does. House concludes that the beta-blockers her husband has been taking has diminished his sex drive, and he has been adding them to Mrs. Campbell's morning oatmeal in an attempt to diminish hers. Diagnosis: dosed with beta blockers. Status: presumed cured. [107]

Carly L
. - a student in Rebecca Adler's class who carelessly dropped a book on the class gerbil. [101]

Charlie - Husband of Jill, father of Jill's "parasite". [104]

Baby Boy Chen-Lupino - Newborn who became ill with an enterovirus shortly after his birth at PPTH. Son of Kim and Judy. Died at 6:57 PM, December 2, 2004. Status: Deceased [104]

Cora - companion and caretaker of John Henry Giles. [109]

Dan - Patient. Age 16. Lacrosse player, #28 for the Tartans (and #18 for the Comets, seen during House's daydream). A smart young man who figured out he was adopted by researching the inheritability of cleft chins, which he has but his parents do not. Diagnosed with subacute sclerosing panencephalitis. Status: Improving, presumed cured. [102]

Dan's Mom - Mother of Dan, patient in Paternity. [102]

Dan's Dad
- Father of Dan, Patient in Paternity. [102]

Margo Davis - mother of Matthew. Somewhat overbearing is her desire to see Matt achieve academic success, and a fierce advocate during his medical care. Lost faith in House's team when the made dangerous mistakes in his treatment, but had little choice in accepting their advice when Matt was near death. She was grateful that Matt was eventually cured, but still thought of all the doctors as "arrogant jerks." [108]

Matthew Davis - patient, teenager. Falls ill during an AP calculus exam. Son of Margo, who is somewhat overbearing. Has a cat. Likes homemade pizza. Grew an organic vegetable garden for environmental science class, using orange peel oil as a pesticide.  Became ill from organophosphate poisoning when he purchased a pair of jeans off the back of a farmworker's truck. Status: cured [108]

Ed - husband of Elyse. Ed met Elyse after he vomited on her towels at a party, and attempted to hide the crime by throwing them out the window.

Egg Salad Lady - a PPTH cafeteria server with poor hygiene. Her glassy eyes and runny nose indicated to House that the woman had a cold, and had taken medication. That she was comfortable wiping her nose on her sleeve suggested to him that she might be lackadaisical about washing her hands after using the toilet. [101]

Elyse - Patient. Occupation: rotisseur (prepares roasted meat and gravy in a large restaurant brigade).  Elyse met her husband, Ed,at a party during their freshman year . Ed had overindulged and vomited on her towels. To hide the crime, he threw the towels out the window. Elyse contracted
African trypanosomiasis from a sexual encounter Ed's jogging partner. Elyse chose to risk death rather than confess to the affair, but it came to light anyway during the course of her treatment. Her husband left her when her condition improved. Status: cured. [107]

Sister Eucharist -  infirmarian at Sister Augustine's monastery. Sister Eucharist believed Augustine suffered from hypochondria, and faked illnesses to get special treatment.Has a fondness for chocolate. [105]


Mr. Funsten
- Clinic patient. Lives in Maplewood, NJ. Diagnosed with a large, oozing infection of the knee, which he lanced with his wife's nail file. House determined that Mr. Funsten had driven 70 miles to PPTH because he is excessively litigious, and no local doctor will treat him. Mr. Funsten serves House with a lawsuit claiming considerable emotional distress. House claims Mr. Funsten has gonorrhea. Another test is required, which House will not perform. Mr. Funsten attempts to snatch the legal papers back, but is unsuccessful. Status: Undetermined. [102]


John Henry Giles
- Patient. Legendary jazz trumpeter who is admitted to PPTH with pneumonia, under Foreman's care. John Henry is confined to a wheelchair due to what is believed to be ALS, and is being treated with an experimental drug protocol by Dr. Marty Hamilton.  House thinks otherwise, and John Henry is eventually diagnosed with an AVM. Status: cured. [109]

Good-Looking Baby
- newborn child of Black Couple who squalled loudly when House yanked him from his bassinet, looking for symptoms of a spreading infection.  [104]

Dr. Hall
- Unseen doctor. Paged in Paternity [103]

Dr. Marty Hamilton - John Henry Giles' primary physician in Los Angeles, CA. Foreman did his residency with Dr. Hamilton.  Dr. Hamilton has a friendly and easy-going manner, and a habit of calling people by their first names, which House dislikes.  [109]

Ethan Hartig - Father of Maxine Hartig, married to Karen Hartig. Suggested the names Amber, Desiree, Bambi and Kandy Kane for his newborn daughter. He thought his wife's choice of Max sounded like a professional boxer's name, but agreed to it anyway. [104]

Karen Hartig - Mother of Maxine Hartig, married to Ethan Hartig. Rejected her husband's choices for their daughter's name as "stripperish." Thought her marriage would not last if ther child died, due to the experience of her next-door neighbors whose son died in a car crash leading to their separation four months later. [104]

Maxine Hartig - Patient.  Newborn who became gravely ill with an enterovirus shortly after her birth at PPTH. Initially misdiasnosed with a bowel obstruction. Diagnosis: Echo 11 infection. Status: Cured

Hospital Lawyer - attorney who advised House against using different treatments to determine which infection the infants are suffering from during an outbreak on the maternity ward. [104]

Baby Boy Howsam - Patient. Newborn who became ill with shortly after his birth at PPTH. Diagnosis: Echovirus 11 infection. Status: Cured [104]

Inhalation therapist
- unseen respiratory technician paged over the PA [104]

Jake - lacrosse player [102]

Jill - Clinic patient. Complains of loose joints, inability to lose weight, and feeling sick. House tells her she has a "parasite" in the form of a four-month fetus, despite her use of a birth control implant. She is unsure of the paternity of the child, due to a one-night stand with an ex after a fight with her husband, Charlie. She tricks Charlie into giving blood for a paternity test by telling him he may have mono. When she discovers Charlie is the father of the child, she is overjoyed and asks House to do her pre-natal care and deliver the baby. He declines, but changes his mind when he realizes it would give him a reason to use the OB/GYN lounge.
Diagnosis: pregnancy. Status: learned to embrace her parasite. [104]

Judy - mother of Baby Boy Chen-Lupino, partner of Kim. [104]


Dr. Kahn
- Unseen doctor at PPTH, paged to pediatrics [101]

Dr. Kent  - Unseen doctor at PPTH, paged over the PA [104]

Kid #2
- a child in Rebecca Adler's class [101]

Kim - partner of Judy, co-parent of Baby Boy Chen-Lupino [104]


Labor Couple - soon-to-be-parents sent to Princeton General when an epidemic closed the maternity ward at PPTH.  Indentified as Young Man and Young Woman. [104]

Melanie Landon
- Miss Melanie, a teacher at Rebecca Adler's elementary school. [101]

Shelly Lever
- Clinic patient. A woman whose leg hurts after running six miles. House pages Cuddy for a consult to annoy her, but she outwits House by sending Wilson. Status: unknown [103]

Dr. Lim - Obstetrician at PPTH. Dislikes House using the OB lounge. Believes that pediatricians should take the blame for problems babies develop after delivery. Delivered Maxine Hartig. (Unnamed in Paternity, named in Babies & Bathwater) [104]

Chi Ling - teenage boy who became seriously ill from organophosphate poisoning from a pair of jeans purchased off the back of truck. Attends the same school as Matthew Davis, and rides the same bus. Lives with his parents, and has no idea how to use the washing machine. Owns a dog. Status: cured. [108]

Chou-Young Ling - father of Chi, married to Jen. Keeps two bamboo trees which he fertilizes with dried seaweed. [108]

Jen Ling - mother of Chi Ling, married to Chou-Young. [108]

Baby Boy Limpert
- Newborn at PPTH who did not become ill during an epidemic. Kept at the hospital longer than usual because he had a bit of jaundice. His blood was taken for testing for antibodies, to see which diseases he was immune to as a control for the sick babies. [104]

Male Med Student (Tie Clip) - Med student who, in Cuddy's opinion, did not practice proper tie hygiene.  He did not secure or remove the tie, so Dr. Cuddy solved the problem with scissors. [104]

- Hospital Pharmacist (Unnamed until ...) [103]

Math Whiz - student in Matthew Davis' AP Calculus class [108]

Jodi Matthews - Clinic patient. Ms. Matthews claimed to be concerned, a week after the fact, that her mucus was yellow. As it was now normal, she showed House a "pale goldenrod" paint chip as representative of her snot's former color. House diagnosed her as about to be fired from her job, and squeezing every possible benefit from her soon-to-be-terminated health insurance, evidenced by new glasses and recent dental work. Ms. Matthews in turn diagnosed House as not very nice. Upon acknowledging her impending firing (she doesn't like being told what to do), House offers her a full body scan. Status, presumed healthy, as nothing was wrong with her in the first place. [103]

Mrs. Merrell
- Brandon's mother. Unintentionally made her son very ill by giving him his cough pills without his doctor's knowledge. [103]

Brandon Merrell
- Patient. Male, age 22. Diagnosed with colchicine poisoning due to a pharmacy error.  Engaged to Mindy. Has friends named Dan and Mike who encouraged him to try ecstasy. Works for Mr. Innabe. [103]

Robert Merrell - Brandon's father [103]

Mrs. Miller - frumpily-clad teacher overseeing the AP Calculus exam during which Matthew Davis falls ill. She prowls the room obnoxiously accusing various students of cheating, some of whom actually are. See Amy. [108]

Mindy - Brandon's fiance. Enjoys vigorous sexual intercourse, and disapproves of drug use. Mindy believes things don't always work out for the best. She is initally disliked by Brandon's mother, but is eventually accepted into the family. [103]

- Clinic patient who diagnosed himself with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or Fibromyalgia. House sent him off with a pill bottle filled with candy (and a refill). Status: we haven't seen him again, so perhaps a full course of candy cured his ailments. [101]

Dr. Morrell - unseen doctor paged to the CAP lab. [108]

Stephen Morgan - unseen person paged to hospital administration over the PA [104]

Jerry Morris - Clinic patient. A young man with tattoos and piercings who visits the clinic to have an MP3 player removed from his rectum. House deduces its location from Jerry's reluctance to sit down despite waiting 30 minutes, combined with the embarrassment factor. As Jerry has a birdie tattoo on his arm, House thinks Jerry has a high tolerance for humiliation, so Jerry's reticence about his condition would indicate a humiliation factor that is extraordinarily high. House passes him along to Cuddy. Status: presumed cured upon extraction. [103]

Mother Superior - the nun in charge of the monastery in which Sister Augustine, Sister Pius, and Sister Eucharist live. [105]


Naomi - see Soap Patient [104]


Nurse: assisted Chase with the care of Matthew Davis [108]

OB1 - Obstetrician at PPTH. Dislikes House using their lounge and pediatricians deflecting blame and taking credit for his work. [104]

Orange Man - Clinic patient, complaining of back spasms from an injury sustained after his cleats got stuck during a golf game. He was unaware that he had turned orange from consuming large quantities of carrots and megadose vitamins containing niacin. House also diagnosed the man as a cuckold. He followed his wife, and appeared later without his wedding ring, so apparently House was correct. He is a financial contributor to PPTH. [101]


Lucas Palmero:
age 15. A strong and determined young man who took charge once his mother, Lucy, became ill and unable to work. Luke tends their home, which, though small and shabby, is clean and rigidly organized, with all the drawers labelled, and their contents neatly folded. Luke keeps extensive, detailed records of Lucy's medical care and disability benefits. Luke lies about his age, claiming to be 18, to accomplish tasks for Lucy. Luke takes tender care of Lucy, reading poetry to her, and noting the nutritional information of the only food she will eat. He occasionally gives her vodka in measured amounts to soothe her when she becomes agitated, noting it in his records, careful not to give her too much. Luke shows signs of strain when he breaks down upon hearing of his mother's vitamin K deficiency. Luke confides to House that he thought his mother was too controlling before she became ill, but he misses his mother the way she was. When Lucy recovers, Luke is overjoyed. House allows Luke to believe it was he, not Lucy, who called Social Services, leaving Luke with a grudge. [106]

Dr. Paul
-  Unseen doctor at PPTH, paged to the Recovery Room over the PA [104]

Sister Pius - a young nun at Sister Augustine's monastery. She believes Augustine's hand wounds resemble stigmata, and is shocked and fascinated by television content. [105]

Reception Nurse - probably the nurse who alerts House that Molnar has returned for his refill. [101]

Dr. Richards
- Unseen doctor at PPTH, paged over the PA [104]

Dr. Salazar: unseen doctor at PPTH, paged over the PA [104]

Santa Claus - clinic patient with inflammatory bowel. The poor man has bloody diarrhea, gas, and pain. His previous doctor (who kept impressively detailed charts) prescribed sulfasalzine, steroid enemas, oral corticosteroids, 5-ASA, 6-mercaptopurine.  House prescibes cigarettes, 2 per day, referencing medical studies which show their effectiveness against inflammatory bowel disease. Santa is concerned that cigarettes are "addictive and dangerous," but House reassures him that nearly all the drugs he prescribes are addictive and dangerous. [105]

Soap Doctor - ran an MRI and gave Naomi her diagnosis of amnesia. Later declared his love for her. [104]

Soap Patient (Naomi) - had some sort of accident and developed amnesia. Her doctor admired her will and determination to recover, and declared his love for her. [104]

Substitute Teacher - lady who took over Rebecca Adler's class while she was ill. [101]

Suburban Pharmacist  - Pharmacist  who filled Brandon's cough medicine prescription, accidentally filling the bottle with a gout medication containing colchicine. [103]

Sydney - a student in Rebecca Adler's class. [101]

Two Sick Babies
- Patients. Unidentified sick infants who became ill during an epidemic at the PPTH maternity ward. Diagnosis: Echovirus 11 infection. Status: cured  [104]

Tommy - musician in the studio with Brandy (Clint Baker, formerly of Riddlin' Kids) [109]

Volunteer (Teddy Bear Lady)
- Elderly woman who volunteers at the PPTH maternity ward, handing out teddy bears. She was infected with an enterovirus which gave her a cough and runny nose.  As a result of her contaminating the teddy bears, six babies became seriously ill, one of which died. [104]

Dr. Wolf
- a doctor at PPTH whom House attempts to page for a consult on Mr. Funsten. House may have been lying about Dr. Wolf's existence for the "boy who sued Wolf" joke. [102]


Young Woman (Yummy Mummy)
- Mother of Breast-fed Baby, who believes that vaccines are a scam perpetrated by pharmaceutical companies. House terrified her by describing the market for all-natural baby-sized coffins. [102]

Young Woman  - see Labor Couple [104]

Young Man - see Labor Couple [104]

Gregory House -
James Wilson
Lisa Cuddy
Eric Foreman
Robert Chase
Allison Cameron

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